MISTER T

Judging from the title, most of my audience is probably thinking that this writer has completely deviated from the title of this blog, but let's face it, there's not a more colorful personality in this country than the legendary Mr. T.

To his loyal fans, Mr. T is has not exited stage right. Rather, Mr. T is now larger than life, as he will star in his own reality show, Reali-T, whereby Mr. T will go from city to city correcting people's behavior, for, as Mr. T has so prominently stated, "In every city, there's a fool to pity."

Yet, it is difficult to understand the T's vocabulary. So, here's a quick lesson. Jibber Jabber is when a fool is saying something completely absurd. Yet, one should not "Pity The Fool," unless the "Fool" is speaking "Jibber Jabber" and is properly informed to that fact.

So, as an example, President Bush's statements on Iraq, Afghanistan, the budget, the economy, prescription drugs, torture, and tapping his own citizens phones is nothing more than "Jibber Jabber." Since he has been told by the courts, his own National Intelligence Estimate, and GAO numbers, he knows that he is speaking "Jibber Jabber." Therefore, every American should "Pity The Fool" at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue in Washington, DC.

For those who still fail to understand, Jibber Jabber would be equivalent to bullshit, and "Pity The Fool" would be equivalent to dumbass. Using the same example, President Bush's statements are bullshit. Therefore, he is a dumbass, cocksucking, motherfucker.

Okay, I made the last two up, but if you believe the reports about Jeff Gannon, then the second adjective could be true. However, the last one can't be. Who, in their right mind, would want to have sex with Barbara Bush?